2 dreams dat i had dreamed about him.

Actually tis morning nid to accompany him to his match but i was overslept n by d time i woke up d match was  over . d 1st dream dat  i dreamed was he went to bed wif a gal n i happened to went up his hse to find him n wad happened next im nt sure cus i was awakened by wad i had saw. D 2nd dream was we were quarreling wif something but wad was it i wasnt sure cus i cant hear a thing. within that few hours of sleep and i dreamed 2 things that had scared me to death !!! Is there anything going to happened to us or im jus missing him that's why i dreamed about him but is it have to be like these kind of dream? really wonder....

Hope everything will be fine n nothing will happened to us !!  

Jobless

Had been teminated frm Mcd cus I had NS for 1week. Went to fish & do but no response frm them. I guess I hav to find other job. Cass got a job at raffles but too far. Sy is bukit batok quite near but nid to keep on talking n hav to torerate customers' scolding. Dunno la. Sien.

FDP

1st time got stain on other ppl's bed. So ps sia. D only thing I did was to bath n run away frm d hse. N his mum had to wash 3 layers of bed sheet. Feel so guilty sia. Nxt time dun wan go his hse Liao la. 

Malaysia trip

Went Over to Malaysia wif aunty Doris n bibi on sat . Went over to eat n den Jiu come bak le. Sun went in to do my nails n we lost our way bak n we stay over at huiqi hse. Quite fun to had a day like dat. 

Transferring out of amk

I guess I will be transferring out on May 1 . Hope I will get btr over there . Cus all those fun ppl had left I oso shall leave tis store. Maybe dat store will be more fun? I will nvr noe until I was there. Chiu Ming told me dat he heard something frm somewhere n dat person had complaint about me . Nvm I guess I noe who cus when I was bak wif him u r like oops..... Haha. U will nvr get tis type of fwen in ur life . U will nvr experience wad I am experiencing or goin through. Only noe how to say about others y nt say about urself. B!tch u will nvr ever win me! If dat time I nvr help u will u get d highest score in d test? I doubt so. 2side face. C how long u can survive . Only noe how to say about others bad , r u doin a very good job? Nt really so pls jus do ur own things can le. 

31/3/14 we had once n it makes me hurt but on 13/4 he improved a lot n it doesn't hurt me any more. He was rite dat for d 1st it might get hurt n  after dat I will be enjoying. I really enjoy it. Haha, on 13/4 if I wasn't tired I think we can hav it for d whole nite w/o resting. I tot he could come over but he can't. Nvm I shall nt think so much on tis.

12/4/14 last time meeting

Maybe tis will be d last time we r meeting. I won't forget about u. U always in my heart.
Last time text like couple.

His last day at work

Had again on his last day of work. After he had been smashed at work n we went horny inside d ahu room dat we near start to kiss but after a while I finished my stuff n went home n I went to his hse. He told me dat he was horny bak den jus dat he control it.  

Was thinking about u n u texted me! Wow

maybe tis is wad i wan

maybe tis is wad i wan..... to let him hate me, to let him wont wan to look for me or stop thinking about me..... as i had make him n her broke up ....... nw they r fine n im here dripping bleed on d floor........ i noe there wont hav a machine to rewind everything to last time...... i noe is time to stop all tis stupid things n move on. i had make a fool out of myself in front of them n i guess they wont be my fwen/s wif me as they will think im a bitch...... who noes if im dare to love again as tis is d 1st time dat i had hurt myself thru love. tis is making me dying i really dunno wad can i do or wad to do . hope i can jus let everything go n dun c them forever if nt i really dunno wad can i do . he will be leaving us soon on d 27 march. tis will be d last time i c him n i hav no other reason to look for him anymore as i had messed everything up . there isnt any turning point at all for me . for him i dun think he will dare to look for me any more as i noe he loves her a lot n is more den me. i can feel dat his love towards me arent more den hers . i noe if i keep holding on im d only 1 dat is suffering n they will be happy enjoying their life...... so d only solution for me is to stop everything stupid n move on ! maybe i will find someone love me or maybe not i still hav to carry on my life no matter wad....... i noe i will be very upset nw..... it will feel btr some times ltr. hope tis will be d last time i post something so emo. i really dun like to cry..... but all memory jus keep flash bak n its making me upset n i noe i cant do anything to make him mine again as i had tried n i make him miserable . he dun even text me since den..... i noe that those happy times will always stay wif me jus dat i cant take it y he choose to stead wif me n nw i fall so deep n he jus left me like nth had happened to us! whenever i saw him it makes me think of d times we are tgt. hope after he left i wont hav tis feeling or maybe i will miss him more ..... i noe its time to let go ! i really hav to let go ! i really hav to..... hav to...... wish they can last long n be tgt till d end ! those he cant do wif me he can do wif her.! i always wanted to c sunrise n he nvr bring me to 1 n he brought her ! i wan soft toy frm him , he didnt giv me n he giv her. i noe i will nvr win her ! she has his whole heart ! really hav to stop all tis le ! ! I CAN LIVE WITHOUT HIM !!!!!

15/3/14 2am

Had tried it. I tot it would be salty but it is tasteless. He wondered y I am like tis n I told him previously oso like dat. N he got nth else to say. We had a sip before start. I dunno how to start it maybe his intention was to chat a bit den start n I was too 猴急to start everything. He said he had no energy to had d 2nd time but 1st time we had it we had 2nd time. N it hurt me too. I tot he dun like me dats y he do tis but den I realize dat he was drunk. After he got drunk he still will think for himself if it's me I will let it be. 

9/3/14

We had it again . He asked me out to buy his stuff at popular n went for a drink n k at civil centre . He chased me out again. 

6/3/14 unforgettable day

Had meeting in d morning before meeting went for hiring wif Vanessa n theviya. After d meeting we went to Vanessa hse to have steamboat after dat went to civil centre for k . Maxing Samantha lipping n boss oso go. It's really fun ! After dat went to his hse n he said he haven hav sex since he left me n we had 2 times in dat nite. Jus dat he wasn't dat gentle any more as he said we won't be tgt only sex . I won't mind but I think he won't look for me in a while guess by nxt week or month he will look for me. 

sam n cm had talked to me about forgetting about higher nitec as if i nvr succeed in higher nitec i will be wasting 2 years n 3 years in poly so they suggested to take up a private course outside and work full time in mcd as to save some money for d course dat i might like. i feel like y nt give it a try as i had alr wasted 2yrs before jus dat i will be getting a private diploma of 10k+ for a course dat d course might take up one or one and the half month to complete my course in order to get d cert. if i can get d cert n get pay i wont mind jus dat it will be more tougher den in sch as in sch they teach more on knowledge while private is more on projects. quite a lot of ppl said getting a private is more easier to get d cert but i hav to waste my money on tis cert for over 10 grands . isit worth it? i realy dunno. sam had shared dat her studies wasnt dat good so she choose tis path to get a cert on private which she is goin to end she course soon. if i were to choose the same path as her will i succeed like her? will i fulfill wad it is entitle? will i be able to cope wif work n projects at the same time? i really dunno

i dun hav to get transferred out if im a assistance mgr n cm said dat i wont get transferred if i can outshine thiviya n i said i cfm will do btr den her ! hope i can !

U think u r btr den me? U can do everything by urself uh? U think I octopus? If u can u do la when I was busy wif so many things yet u didn't even wan to help. I oso noe dat things is down did I didn't help? I nid to look after l2 n am I running production? No wor den? Knn nxt time u work I won't work. Since u so outstanding ma . So be it! Try me somemore

Who d fuck do u think u r ? So wad if ur sis bf is tis store rm?! Dun mess wif me hor! Knn

my feelings

this few days keep goin out n hav fun . went out outing wif huiqi, ivyn and kaisheng. meet in d morning n huiqi was late cus of traffic jam. after meeting at cwp we went to 888 to hav our brunch. after dat all went home to take our things n went to haw par villa . after dat went to nex to hav our dinner n after dat we went to 888 fairprice to buy some beer n snacks to slack at ivyn hse. after slacking den we all went home as all hav to work but im d luckiest as i work in d evening. tis few days i keep drinking n i used up all my money n i had to lent frm my mum. really bad. had failed my exam n i cant continue my study as my result is really very poor . hope i can get to higher nitec without waiting for 1 yr . really hope i can !!!

D scar

Tis scars will always remind me of how stupid I am on dat day! I will nvr forgets

24 nov 2013 i will nvr forgets about u !

i will nvr forget about tis day whr i got d scars on my arm !
d scars are awful n i dun like it ! i really dunno y am i so stupid n use d tong to put d metal thing in d oil in d batch cook vats ! im so so so stupid !! i will nt forgive myself for being so stupid ! hope d scars will disappear but i will always remember it on my heart !

Working m3 n boom again

I scream or shout doesn't mean I'm really angry or wad jus dat I nid to let out some of my angers, I will b fine after dat. Seems like it isn't d 1st time u saw me tis way n I really hav to learn to control dat. I should n I will! Jus learnt how to drawer change n do some of d service. Nt bad nt dat hard but I really dunno y LP said its hard?! Quite easy nt dat hard at all. Maybe I will get wad she mean nxt time as I didn't get d full stress nw. But even if I do I dun think it will be hard on me haha. Seems like quite a lot managers dun like LP. Haha